For a period of time I was feeling barren and defeated, fed up with myself, with traveling and with touring. I had a strange sense of entitlement that led me into a mirrored room of frustration, illusion, and exhaustion. I was listless, lost and buried in a bunker of my own self importance and self loathing.
That all changed in an instant.
In a small, tented gazebo in Lowell, Massachusetts in 2011, a husband and wife approached me at a meet and greet after a show, and had with them a basketball card of their 11 year old son, Jack. They huddled close, pointed down to his beaming smile, wearing his Celtics jersey, holding a basketball, and shared with me that he passed the year before after a long fight with Cancer. They explained to me with warmth and grace that the music I made was important to them in their final days with Jack, and that they still listened together at home, in the sacred hours when they wanted to feel musically connected to him.
It was a moment of immediate transformation for me.
I was blindsided by their generosity and openness. In all their depth of grief, they took the time and energy to come to my show, to wait in the rain, and to offer me such a deeply personal and powerful lesson. In meeting them, in this simple exchange, I felt a renewed purpose. I now wanted to release the self importance that shuttered me in, and expose myself to other people’s stories, embrace them, and experience others first. This beautiful couple left me with Jacks card that night, and when I got home from that tour, I put it on my bookshelf next to my family photos. Sometimes when I walk past his card, I say hello to Jack and his parents, and hope that they are all somewhere feeling peace.
This year it was my turn to experience a great and significant life changing loss, and these songs helped me find peace in that grieving process. The songs on this, my 7th album, are more yours than mine. I feel so grateful to have the opportunity to share, and to listen, to bring more music for you to rejoice, console, reflect, and disappear into darkness, light, big sun, and new moon.